To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
she told me i tasted like america
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
