Your dad touched me again.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
