have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Randomize
