Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
