I smell stomach acid.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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