She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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