I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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