She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Randomize
