420 ftw
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
