dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
