from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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