I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
That accounts for only three of the penises
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
