you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
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