i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
my vag is so smooth its legendary
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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