yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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