I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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