I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
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