I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
