The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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