love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
