either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
