I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Randomize
