just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
