Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize