too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
