How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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