This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I think my fart just growled at me.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
