trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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