Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
