puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
