Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Randomize
