no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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