hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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