He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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