is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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