I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
