I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
