Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
