Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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