im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
