so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
