I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
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