I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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