what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize
