You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
