weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
