he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
