Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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