i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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