Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
