Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Never let your siblings swipe right.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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